41 Reasons Why English Is A Crazy Language. It Makes No Freaking Sense.

Woman With Question Marks

Let’s face it – English is a crazy language.

Next time someone says that the English language is easy, just show them this list:

  1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
  2. The farm was used to produce produce.
  3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
  4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
  5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
  6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
  7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
  8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
  9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
  10. I did not object to the object.
  11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
  12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
  13. They were too close to the door to close it.
  14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
  15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
  16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
  17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
  18. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
  19. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
  20. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
  21. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
  22. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France.
  23. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.
  24. Quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
  25. Writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce and hammers don’t ham.
  26. The plural of tooth is teeth, but the plural of booth isn’t beeth.
  27. One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?
  28. You can make amends but not one amend.
  29. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
  30. If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught?
  31. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
  32. People recite at a play and play at a recital.
  33. You can ship by truck and send cargo by ship.
  34. Noses run and feet smell.
  35. A slim chance and a fat chance mean the same.
  36. A wise man and a wise guy are opposites.
  37. A house can burn up as it burns down.
  38. You fill in a form by filling it out
  39. An alarm goes off by going on.
  40. When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
  41. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all.

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